The Secret Life of Percy and Artemis
by OceanFlameEagle
Summary: NOT PERTEMIS. FRIENDSHIP. Percy's been acting strange, so Annabeth,Nico, the Stolls, Katie, Will, Clarisse,Thalia, and the Hunters try to find out what has happened. Rated T for Annabeth's references to Call of Duty. -ABANDONED-
1. Chapter 1

This is NOT a romantic Pertemis, it is a friendship Pertemis. Well, more like frienemy, but still. No romantic Pertemis. Set after _The Last Olympian_. And before you ask, I'm not Russian...You'll find out.

ALSO, you won't find much of Artemis or Percy in this chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own the PJO series. There's no HoO in here, but I don't own that either..

* * *

Annabeth was working on the latest addition to Olympus in her office (on Olympus) when someone interrupted her.

"Hey, Annabeth?" she turned to the voice that addressed her.

"Yes, Thalia, what is it?" she asked. Thalia was wearing her black leather punk jacket, which seriously did not go with the Hunter uniform and tiara. Annabeth, on the other hand, was wearing her Pokemon pajamas. Don't ask.

Thalia frowned, as if trying to choose the right words, then proceeded to ask her question,"Have you noticed anything..._strange_ going on with Percy?"

Annabeth raised an eyebrow. There was something going on with Percy? "No, I haven't," she looked thoughtful for a moment, then added,"Why, have you?"

Thalia looked down for a moment, then confessed,"Well, he's been acting weird for a whole month, but you were busy with your duties, being the Architect of Olympus and all, so none of us told you," she flinched a little at the glare Annabeth sent her, then continued,"But he's been acting way out-of-character lately. Like yesterday, Will Solace from Apollo went a little to close to the Posiedon Cabin, and Percy came out and chased him all the way to the pavillion." Annabeth's eyes widened.

"Really? Are you sure? That doesn't sound like Percy at all," Annabeth noted. Thalia rolled her eyes.

"Well, _duh_. That why we came to get _you_. You're the Percy expert. He won't let anyone inside his Cabin. Heck, he won't let anyone within a ten feet radius of it!" By the end of Thalia concerned rant, Annabeth was very pale. That indeed did not sound at all like Percy at all.

But. like always, a plan was already forming in her head...

"...Well, Thalia, I agree, that is somewhat strange. But, I have an idea."

"Of course you have one. That's another reason why I came here." Annabeth grinned.

xxx

It was a week later at 10:45 P.M. when Thalia and a few of the hunters showed up in front of the Athena Cabin to meet with Annabeth, Will, Travis, Conner, Clarrise, Katie, Nico, and-surprisingly-Chiron. When questioned, he simply said,"I don't want the newer campers scared off because they came to close to his Cabin."

There was a moment of silence, then Connor spoke up,"Okay, now that we're all here, what's then plan, Annabeth?" They all turned to look at her, curious at what 'ingenius' plan Annabeth might have.

She hesitated first, then started to explain her plan,"Allright. From what surveillance I've managed to set up-"

"Stalker," Travis whispered to Conner. She glared at him, then continued.

"-I've determined that Percy has left Camp Half-Blood about 15 minutes ago. From the way he was dressed, I've also-"

Travis muttered something to Conner again, and this time Thalia kicked him where Apollo don't shine. Travis doubled over in pain, and the other males crossed their own legs in sympathy. The Hunters high-fived Thalia.

"Thank you, Thalia. As I was saying, I've deduced that he'll be out for a few hours. Our goal is simple: break into his Cabin, find and copy the intell we need, and get out before jerries arrive." Everybody looked at Annabeth strangely. "What?"

Nico was the first to find his nerve. "Um...did you say, '_get out before jerries arrive_'?"

Annabeth blushed."Sorry, I've been playing too much Call of Duty."

Everyone decided to question the possibe imposter later.

Katie raised her hand.

"Yes Katie? Did you have a question?"

Katie nodded. "Two, actually."

"Well, enlighten me. Shoot." Everyone raised an eyebrow at her Call of Duty reference again, but wisely kept their mouths shut.

"Well, first, is a team this big really necessary? Percy's cabin is like about the same size as everyone else. Couldn't you just kick the door open and search the place?" Katie asked.

Annabeth shook her head."No, we can't. First off, Percy has managed to somehow convince the Hecate kids to put a protective charm on all entrances to his cabin. If anyone but Percy so much as brushes against it, they will go flying twenty feet away. We would need his permission to come in, but as you know..."

Eyes were widened at this revelation.

"That's not all. Percy has also managed to get the Hephaestus Cabin to put a series of complicated combination of locks and bolts on his door and windows, as a back-up, just in case."

There was more eye-widening.

"Also, Percy has-for some reason-built a _ginormous _labyrinth underneath his cabin. Well, with the help of Tyson and Briares, of course. It's nowhere near as complicated as the actual Labyrinth-it's actually just a huge maze. Though I have no idea why he had one built, anything important enough to cause change in Percy is most likely there."

Jaws fell off faces. The eyes remained widened.

"What's your second question, Katie?" Said demigod shook her head.

"You answered that one**(1)**, but another question rises-how to get past the magical barrier?"

Annabeth grinned. "You'll see."

xxx

20 minutes later, Alex-the Hecate Counseler- broke. "Okay, okay, I'll get the others to break the barrier, just stop pulling on my ear!"

"Well, if you had just accepted the 50 dramchas, your ear could've been saved!" Annabeth retorted.

Under normal circumstances, Alex would've turned her into a frog or something by now, if it weren't for the fact that she was _the _Percy Jackson's girlfriend. Not only did he owe Percy for giving his mom a seat on Olympus and a cabin at camp, he also valued his life very much. Turing Percy's girlfriend into an animal would be counterprodutive in his goal to die old.

Alex turned to the rest of his cabin." Allright, guys, we're gonna break Percy's barrier!" Several groans went up, only to be silenced by him. "Guys! Do you _really_ want _Annabeth Chase_ as our enemy?"

Silence...

"That's what I thought."

xxx

40 minutes later, the barrier had been taken down. It had been an ingenious work of magic. It took only five minutes to fully set up the highly powerful barrier, but it was nearly impossible to break magically, forget physcally. Clarisse had complaned about this until Alex had tipped them off about another Hecate spell in the maze.

"Try to avoid triggering this spell. But If you do, about 15-20 humaniod beings made out of water will materialize around you. They have no weapons, but their pretty good at Kung-Fu. You can kill them, it's just much harder," Alex had explained. Everyone justed started at him in disbelief when he also stated that only Percy could undo the spell. Well, Clarisse was happy, at least...They didn't even know how the trap was triggered...

xxx

They were geared and ready. Yes, Chiron was still in it. How amazing was that?

Using the truely evil yet magnifigant skills of the Stolls, they broke in; however, like Annabeth had informed them, the locks were extremely complicated, and it took them a whole 10 minutes to enter. The first thing Annabeth did was roll in(Black-Ops style), holding her knife, brandishing it left and right. This caused a lot of snickering from Will, until she told him that her knife was a ballistic knife. He got the message.

Annabeth ordered a quick search of the place. When asked why, she responded with cold, hard logic,"From my obvervations, the maze is still somewhat complicated. Percy-no matter how cautious he's become-would still need to keep a map somewhere he could easily access it."

And so, they searched. And came across _another _hurdle.

There was a secret panel that obviously containted the map. Travis found it when Katie pushed him when he stepped on her foot.

"So...how do we open it?" Conner asked.

Annabeth looked the keyboard the panel of fake wood had been concealing. There was a hint engraved onto the area next to the keyboard:1. You have 5 chances. 2. Dectective Conan M3**(2)**. 3. The map is your reward.

She came to a rather obvious conclusion,"Well, it looks like we have to enter a password in this machine. I have 5 chances, and the map is my reward. I don't the second clue though...and this keyboard is...what? Is that _Russian_?" Annabeth sighed heavily, confused. "Anybody here know Russian?"

Chiron raised his hand. "I do."

"Okay, then. One problem solved. Okay, anyone know what Percy might use as a password?" Annabeth inquired. Everyone stared at her.

She blushed."Oh. Right. Chiron-"

"On it. Let's see...Аннабет, Russian for _Annabeth_. Got it." Chiron beeped in the characters.

An big red **X** appeared on the floor.

Chiron was befuddled. "I don't get it. How is it wrong?"

One of the Hunters came to a conclusion,"Perphaps your name is not the password..."

"Maybe it's 'Blackjack'," Nico suggested.

They entered it, and an **X **appeared on the ceiling.

'Posiedon' and 'I am awesome' didn't work either.

Needless to say, they were frustrated. Annabeth especially. "URG! PERSEUS JACKSON, WHAT IS YOUR FRICKIN' RUSSIAN PASSWORD?"

Clarisse and Katie were in deep thought. Suddenly, their eyes shot open. In a perfect-and creepy-synchronization, they asked Annabeth,"Was the second clue,'Dectective Conan M3?'"

"Yeah," she confirmed.

They both looked at eachother.

"Try 'The Last Wizard Of The Century,'" they suggested.

Annabeth raised an eyebrow. "Why in Hades would it be-"

"Just try it."

She nodded, though doubtfully. "Chiron-"Annabeth was cut off.

"On it." Slowly, he type in what he needed:Последний мастер века**(3)**.

BEEP! BEEP!

The keyboard shot up and out, reavealing the map.

Everyone stared at Clarisse and Katie.

Annabeth nodded at them,"Good job, privates. This is an important step in the invasion. Now, all we have to do is find and secure the entrance to the underground tunnel, and secure the intell, perferably _without _making contact with the enemy." She glared at Clarisse as she said the last part.

Nobody asked why she talked as if she were in WWII. They already knew why.

xxx

As it turns out, the entrance to the 'underground tunnel' was opened when Annabeth fell into the water fountain, and her hand pushed a button in the water, causing the fountain to move due north, revealing a flight of stairs going downward.

Once again, Annabeth began her Call of Duty talk.

"Hunters, secure the entrance. Stay outside. If Percy comes back, open fire, and sound the alarm. When you run out of munitions, retreat to the Campsite."

The Hunters grinned at the prospect of 'opening fire' at a male.

"Do NOT let him see who you are. If he follows, lose him, or throw him off track. Should such a situation happen, hopefully, we'll be out and gone before he sees us. Move out!"

* * *

Do not ask how all of this is related to the fic. Just read on. Please review!

**(1) The question she was about to ask was "Why are the Stolls here?"**

**(2)Cookies to those who know what I'm talking about! =)**

**(3)Google translated...**


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I am SO SORRY that I haven't been updating! School got out just couple of days ago, and for some reason or another, my mom decided that I should stay away from the computer! I know, weird, right? But I convinced her that for the time being, she should let me update my stories. Phew. Again, I am so sorry.

Disclaimer: I do not own the "Percy Jackson and the Olympians" series or any and all characters associated with the series. "Percy Jackson and the Olympians" belongs to it's rightful owner(Rick Riodan). Please do not copyright my _podex_.

_**WARNING: If you don't Kakashi, wait 'till the next chapter. This is just a filler, since I'm not done with the chapter that advances the plot yet. It's long. I put this in because I don't want this to just be an author's note, and because I feel really bad for not updating for so long. **_

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It wasn't all that hard going down the stairs. It was only about 2,000 steps. Nor was it hard to climb up the rock-climbing wall of death. They had to do that everyday, after all. Little challenge for Chiron, though. Any of the other 'menial' delays were past quite easily. No, the _hard _part was putting up with Annabeth's completly changed personality once they entered.

Will turned to Annabeth."Hey, um, Annabeth? Can I ask you something?"

"Yes?"

"Why are you wearing a mask that covers half your face, and a headband that's covering your left eye?" Will asked.

Annabeth lazily raised the other available(aka, visible) eyebrow lazily. Then she spoke through the mask that covered her lower face and nose,"I can't tell you why I'm wearing the mask, but even _you _should know why the headband is nessecary." She said it in a tone that made him feel stupid.

Will sighed and glanced at Katie. "You try." Katie shrugged.

"I'll try." She turned to Annabeth, who was now reading a book, but was still wearing the ridiculous get-up. Katie sighed in relief, however, as Annabeth was reading, which was an Annabeth thing. Encouraged, she asked,"What'cha reading, Annabeth?"

Annabeth raised her eyebrow. "I seem to be reading a book."

Katie eye twitched. "Yes, I know, but what's the title of the book?"

"Oh, it's 'Make-Out Paradise!: The Special Edition', why?" Annabeth replied. Everybody sputtered at that. Especially Chiron.

Nico got the first word out,"D-did you say _Make-Out Paradise_?"

Annabeth glanced at the group behind her. "Yes, why? Do you have a problem with it?"

"Yes, I do," Chiron said. "That series is rated X, Annabeth, X! It's probably the _only _book series with an X-rating!" Chiron exclaimed.

Annabeth's only response was to giggle at the book, which shocked everyone. Annabeth doesn't _giggle_. She just doesn't. Thalia seemed especially concerned. "Um, Annabeth, are you okay? Did you hit your head sometime this month?"

"I'm fine, my beautifully sexy Hunter," Annabeth responded. Then she did something no-one had dared to do to a Hunter before. Annabeth took Thalia's hand in hers and _kissed it_. Well, she was still wearing the mask, but it still counts. Then she added,"Am I concerning you, Thalia? Please, only worry for yourself, my beautiful Maiden of the Moonlight."

As you can imagine, Thalia was torn in between being repulsed, shocked, confused, flattered, and flustered. Apparently,she went for the last three, because she blushed heavily, and said,"Uhhh..."

Travis grinned happily. "Woah! Conner, you get that?"

Connor replied, just as excited,"Way ahead of you." He closed the camera, saving the scene in the video section.

Katie rubbed her eyes, not wanting to believe what she just saw.

Clarisse banged her head against the wall.

Nico just shook his head."Apparently, anything Percy-related has a negative effect on Annabeth's brain. I'll remember that."

Chiron sighed. This was gonna take a _looooong _time.

* * *

Again, sorry for the delay! I'll try my best to get the plot-advancing chapter in before or by Saturday! I hope this entertained you for now!


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